for contentment.
I often times feel inadequate.
Very inadequate.
These feelings of inadequacy are bad.
They are bad because I have a hard time being content because I always feel inadequate.
This makes me mad and sad.
Sad because I have so much to be happy about.
A beautiful son.
A hardworking lovely husband.
I get to be a stay-at-home mommy & wife.
I come from and married into great families.
I have food, clothing, and shelter.
Mad because all that should be enough, more then enough, to be content.
Yet I find myself constantly wishing I had more.
I hate it.
I just wish I could be happy with what I have.
Monetarily. Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. And all things in between.
At times I want to move to the boonies, & live life with my man & my baby.
Away from the world, the Internet, magazines, TV, and people.
Would contentment be easier to find then?
I don't know.
I wish I had the answers to this dilemma.
We all feel that way at times but I sincerely believe it is Satan working us. He knows our weakness's and he will use them to make us feel depressed and dis-content. We really have to sincerely count our blessings and try to not let him work us like that. I know cuz it happens to me a lot too... Wish I didn't have to work, wish I was thin, wish I had money etc etc.. I just heard about a friend getting divorced for these very reasons and I tried to tell her to count her blessings and not let money be the reason of her divorce but don't know what's gonna happen. We'll see.
ReplyDeleteDon't worry, be happy!
Love you ... MOM
Give it a few years, you won't care what anyone thinks :)... it makes me think of Renae's chart in RS, very true (at least the first 30 seemed to be pretty accurate).
ReplyDeleteSo... Colby fell asleep last night before eating his cupcake...am I a bad wife if I eat it? I'm so tempted! Hmmm...
Sweetheart... We are human, and we are always going to be striving for more. If we didn't the world would not be as beautiful as it is. Some of the most amazing things were built and created because people were never fully satisfied...Eifel Tower, Bridges, buildings, families!!! I think this helps us do and be better people! And just because you want more does not make you a bad person.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry you feel that way, but it is true, I think we all feel that way at times. There is a book at Seagull Book that just came out called contentmentn it is really good and uplifting you might want to look into getting it, if you can't find it let me know and I can mail you a copy. I know you can get it online at www.Seagullbook.com or you can call one of the stores and do a phone order and they will send it to you. Good luck, let me know what I can do to help. Bytheway, cute picture of you, you are so beautiful and photogenic. p.s. why didn't we hang out in high school?
ReplyDeletehi mrs. heather, thank you so much for your nice comment! i love your blog and all of your pictures and insights. I checked out your reupholstery blog. whaaaat??! I am dying over the couch. I bought a big beautiful pink settee ad DI for $25 a while ago and I'm just waiting for the perfect opportunity to recover it. You rock woman!
ReplyDeleteBTW, I think we all feel like this sometimes, we all want more. But I think that can be turned into a positive thing if we allow it to- kinda the whole work hard for things you want to achieve and let go of the crap you can't control. hope you're on the up and up soon. =)
It is so hard to find contentment in this world that is constantly telling us we should have more, do more! You are so amazingly talented Heather! I find myself wishing I had your skills! Focus on all the good you have, and not what you don't, and you'll be amazed at how many more blessings you'll receive!
ReplyDeletePretty sure every woman/wife/mother feels this at times. Maybe, more specifically, once a month? Not that that makes you feel any better, I realize, but its part of life's ups and downs. You rock. And you make a lot of people think, smile, laugh, feel happy, feel inadequate (ironic), everyday. I love your hardcore honesty.
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